Being a parent is not a trivial thing. And can not be said as an easy thing. And to add to the difficulty, there is no school to become a parent in this world. Then how can we be good parents for our sons and daughters? There are no specific guidelines. The most basic to become parents we must love our children. But sometimes without us knowing it, because of the love that we are stuck in some "mistakes" that if not immediately realized will result in no better in the future. I am not an expert in terms of being a parent, but let me share a few things I learned from what I saw and experienced.
• Obeying all the willingness of children
The first mistake that is often made accidentally by the parents is a willingness to obey all children. Can not be too blame, too, because it is triggered by the love of parents for their children. But beware, not all the child wants good for the child. We must be able to distinguish between what is needed with what they want the child. And if a child is familiar or accustomed to getting what he wants, he will grow into a spoiled, and did not appreciate the hard work, and self-centered.
• Doing all things for kids
Have you ever seen a child aged 7 years and still have to be fed every meal? I never, often instead. And it makes me wonder, is it a good thing or just the opposite. Nothing wrong with us as parents to make sure our children get all the help he needed, but be careful not to help us make our children become independent. It is necessary for us to teach independence to children early on. Not that we make it work beyond their means. Independence makes a child become a person who does not always depend on others. It also will shape it into a creative individual. Simple things like learning to feed himself, wearing his own shoes, or even pick up his toys alone is a good thing to be taught as a beginning.
• Boasts a child with excessive
If not careful this will lead to arrogance that without us knowing it could give excessive pressure to the child. There is nothing wrong with a sense of pride in our children. What parent is not happy when his son managed to achieve something. But do not, to borrow a phrase my friend, we make the child window displays. Many of us without us knowing not get caught up in all the children because we sincerely proud of their achievement, but more because of our ego is not willing to lose the others. A child's mother was a good swimmer, my son also had to swim champion. Mrs. B and her son good at playing the piano, my child must be proficient piano, so roughly example depiction. Sincerely appreciate and take pride for every simple thing to achieve our children. Even if your child does not get any achievement, sincere pride in the efforts that he gave. Good and sincere compliments very well for the development of the child's self-confidence. otherwise excessive praise, which is due to a sense not to be outdone by others, it will make a depressed child.
• Too protective
It is the responsibility of parents ensure the safety and health of the child is always awake. But also do not forget, our children need to thrive and have the courage to try new things. Sometimes because of our affection, we unconsciously too far in protecting children. even not at all allow children to play outdoors. Or forbid children to try this and it's because of fear of a child is injured or ill. In fact, basically children already have natural immunity, and that immunity will be more fragile if rarely used. Another result, our children will become timid and did not dare to try new things. He will get used to fear because subconsciously we fear for his safety affect kepriibadiannya. Let the children to try new things and grow as long as it does not exceed the limit.
• Making "for the children" as the reason
This is the reason that I often hear. Even to things that really do not want children. Yes, as parents, we have to do anything for the sake of the child. But think again with a more thoughtful, really what we are doing is good for the child. Many parents who work without knowing the time, to not have time to mingle and listen to the child, and at the end say that it's all for the sake of the child. Is it true that the child need? No one denies that raising children requires a lot of cost. Not to mention for their educational expenses. But who do not let it take the most significant things that belong to you as a parent, that accompanied him to grow, there with him in every development. That is your right, and the rights of your children as well, in addition to the fulfillment of all kebutuhnnya. I was not raised on the family materially abundant. But I remember every moment of my life, where my father was always there for me, until now. Both in good times, when my achievement of something, or when I am angry and sad. Another thing is to force the child to obey our wishes, again with the reason for the good of the child. Good that we desire to be obeyed child is important and he should do. But it would be very unfair if it is only because of our ego as a parent. Such as forcing a child to participate in an activity that is not a talent he is, what happened, instead of being proficient, that there are many quarrels and dissent, even if the child is finally in, it will not be effective.
Again, no one said that being a parent was easy. But believe me it is a great blessing that God has entrusted to us. There will be many blissful moment, as much as the current challenges, we are going to get.
